The Smell of Jesus

When my daughter was younger (and even still sometimes), she would cuddle next to her daddy and watch a TV show or a movie. Then, she would come sit next to me and I could smell her daddy's cologne (actually I think it was his deodorant :)) on her. I would even say that to her sometimes: "you smell like your daddy." I don't know if she knew or understood what that meant, but I thought it was sweet. It represented something to me. She has a dad who loves her and wants to spend time with her, and she is content and comfortable in her daddy's arms. It is a relationship I hope she treasures, and as her mother I adore knowing they have that!!

You know, we have a dad that loves us and wants to spend time with us...a dad we can be content and comfortable resting in His arms. Do we take advantage of this? I confess that I don't....at least not near enough. I'm not sure anyone would hang around me for a few minutes and say, "hey, you smell like Jesus." But I can't think of a better compliment. But there is only one way for this to happen...I need to spend some time with Him. I know people, Spiritual Mentors as it were, who do smell like Him. They are so cool to hang around. They just live life a little bit differently. They carry themselves differently. They reak of peace and joy....and Jesus!!!

Yeah, that's what I need to do....spend some time with Him. He loves me and wants nothing more than to spend time with His daughter.....I'll just wait for someone to say, "you smell like your daddy."

Not The Best Week

This hasn't been the easiest or best of weeks with my eating. I would do well one day, then not so well the next! I truly struggle with this, too: If I "blow it" with my points, I go nuts. Like, then I eat anything I can and not worry about the points. This is crazy thinkin', I know. I can eat sensibly for the rest of the day if I "blow it" and my weight loss most likely won't be compromised. Anyway, I wasn't sure what I would find when I stepped on the scale this morning. The good news is I lost half a pound. I would have liked to have seen more, but considering how I have done with eating, this is more realistic. And Thursday, my family is going out of town for a long weekend. Travelling is usually difficult to stay on track with weight loss. I will see how I do and definitely get right back on track as soon as I'm back!!! Well, HALF A POUND is still half a pound for a grand total of 4 1/2 pounds since I started my focus back!!!

Doodling

I find myself doodling quite a bit these days. One thing that I find myself doodling over and over, even if it is in the air, is a butterfly. I collect penguins and ladybugs...why don't I doodle them? Sure, I could doodle these, too...but I tend to doodle butterflies more than anything and quite a few flowers. I got to wondering what this might mean about me, so I looked it up! I found an interesting article here and learned that my flowers may indicate a gentle personality, a love of nature, and sometimes childlike innocence. This website had some more insight with similar indications, but I liked it because it says that flowers are doodled by social workers quite a bit...and...well....I AM a social worker! And yet another more extensive link has even more analysis of doodles!

I looked for butterfly doodles and really didn't find much, so I had to analyze myself. The butterfly is a symbol of healing and growth. If a caterpillar wasn't allowed to grow and push through the cocoon on its own, it never would be able to fly. That represents me and what I believe...God allows adversity to build our strength...knowing that we will one day be able to fly. If he were to step in and cut open the cocoon, our bodies would swell and our wings would shrivel. He desires for us to fly...and that is what I desire for myself and for others. Although it is so difficult, we learn just how strong we are and how far we can go and how we can fly.

My 3 Pages

About seven years ago, I followed the instructions of Cheryl Richardson in an intriguing book. She said to journal 3 pages a day for 30 days. I did that for 30 days. It happened at a very stressful time in my life and that journalling really helped me at the time, as well as serves as a reminder to how difficult that time was should I go back and read over it. This reminder is nice to know I survived a really awful time and can survive again. For some reason, after I did the 30 days, I quit. From time to time I pick that journal up and usually try to push myself to write 3 pages. I think that is key to push yourself to write 3 pages, even if all you say is "I don't know what to write" over and over. I think that is called free narrative and something cool happens if you just keep your pen or pencil moving, some "imbedded" thoughts come out and you suprise yourself. So, here is my SMART Habit for this week...I will journal 3 pages a day. Blogging is fun and can be like journalling, but writing in my actual handwriting in a notebook is what I'm talking about! I hope to do this at least 30 days!!!

To join in on the SMART Habits, head on over to The Lazy Organizer to learn how...

Thirteen Giggles

Since summer is officially here....and summer in Texas brings with it more heat...I thought I'd share some cool cartoons. I think Calvin & Hobbes is one of the greatest cartoon strips EVER!! And some of my favorites are his snow art, so for my Thursday Thirteen this week, here are 13 of my favorite snow arts from Calvin & Hobbes... (wish they came through a little clearer, sorry, if you want to see more and more clearly, try here)

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.
10.

11.

12.

13.

What Happened to the Cookies?

When my daughter was 15 months old, she wasn't talking. Her older brother started talking around 12 months, maybe before. I started to panic! A friend of mine was an early childhood specialist and asked me, "does she NEED to talk?" I was confused by her question, but she continued by asking, "when her brother asks for a cookie and gets one, does she have to ask or do you just give her one, too?" The more I thought, the more I knew she was right. I thought it was only fair that they each get a cookie or juice or whatever he asked for. She was just following along, cookies just dropping into her life, no need to speak. My friend said the solution was to make her talk. Make her ask for a cookie, don't just give her one.
For the next two weeks, my baby girl was one frustrated little girl. I remember two weeks because it was hard on me, too. But looking back, two weeks is not that long. Oh, but to a 15 month old it is very, very long... Anyway, she did start talking and asking for her own cookie and juice. And talking leads to many other things, other than cookies. Talking is key...or I should say communication is key to relationships....something much greater than cookies.
I wonder if that is how it is with our Heavenly Father. He knows we will be hurt and frustrated, but there is something much greater in store for us. All we know is we have to work harder to get the cookies. But he knows that that hard work has a greater reward for us coming....a skill He deems essential. And sure, that two weeks is a lifetime to us, but to Him, it is a much bigger plan worth the two week suffering! And remember how I said I remember that it was two weeks because it was hard for me, too. How hard is it to deny blessings and treats to our children! God loves me MORE than I love my daughter...and the love I have for my daughter is immeasurable! I don't believe it is easy for God to see us suffer. I would bet it may be harder on Him than it is on us!
My daughter is ten now, and the trauma of two weeks working hard to get her cookie is long gone. As far as I can tell, she has no long-term effects of that trauma. What I do know is she can talk! She is quite good at the talking these days. She is growing and maturing and talking about how she feels, her needs, her desires, her dreams. This is something I could have missed out on if I wasn't willing to allow her to be frustrated. If I can only remember this in my life now...when I am enduring a suffering, God WILL use that for His purposes, because He loves us MORE than we can ever imagine. All we know is the cookies aren't just coming into our life so easily anymore. He knows that He is trying to teach us to talk.

FOUR pounds down!!

I've lost 4 pounds this week! YAY!!! There is something to accountability. Knowing that I was officially weighing in and sharing with the world really helped me to stay on track this week. My biggest challenges are going out to eat with my agency and late into the evening munchies! Where I work, we go out to eat at least once a week (I know we will today and tomorrow). I KNOW how to eat out, as I did it a few years ago when I was very strict with my WW points counting. The thing is, everyone around me is eating such yummy food so I tend to change what I was going to order...and then there's the bread basket or chips basket in front of me (soooooo tempting!). Also, when I get home, it is hard to stay focused...I want to munch! I'm not sure if this is a reward for ending my day or what, but I tend to want cookies or something that if I start to eat one or two, I end up eating eight! This week, I will continue to count my points. I have 18 pounds to go. I CAN do this!!!

Why Can't I Get Motivated?

It is Monday morning and I should be working! Oh, I know, you aren't supposed to should on other people....and you aren't supposed to should on yourself either. Thing is, I didn't get as much work done last week for a sundry reasons (all good, valid reasons)...and I knew come Monday morning, I needed to GET BUSY! I have spent the last 2 1/2 hours surfing the Internet and avoiding work. Maybe I'm just so overwhelmed, I don't know where to start! I am 99.9% sure that is it. And the old saying is the way you eat an elephant is one bite at a time, right? Well, where do you take the first bite? I was hoping that by blogging, I would find the motivation I needed to get started. Here's another great cliche to add to this paragraph: a project begun is a project half done. STARTING is the key! Just jump right in. Just show up and start. So...having said that...I'm going to wrap up and start. If anyone else is surfing the Internet reads this blog and has some nuggets of wisdom to motivate me to work, pleeeeeease do share!!!

Top Momma

Here on this Monday morning, I am surfing the universe and found about becoming a Top Momma. Even though I am so very new to blogging, I signed myself up. Wanna learn more, click here: http://www.topmomma.com/mommas/referal/807

More blogging to come....

Small Steps

I hear of people who love to exercise, who feel like something is missing if they don't get to workout that day. I just don't know how you ever get to that point. Or maybe with my personality, I won't ever get to that point. What I do know is that there have been windows in my life where I worked in some form of exercise and after a point, I did have more energy and a better sense of well-being. Today I am starting the habit of walking on even numbered days. Since today is the 16th, that means I will walk today...even if it is just one mile. In fact, I may walk just one mile for the first month...and work up to two miles or three miles in later months. I have some videos by Leslie Sansome to do some in-home walking if it is raining or too hot (very possible in these Texas summers). Baby steps are so important to me. If I take on huge endeavors, I know myself, and I tend not to follow through. A one mile walk takes about 15 minutes and I'm not even doing it every day!!! Here's to taking on some small steps...

Thirteen Movies That Have Impacted My Life

Graphic Courtesy of: Kelly@Diary of the Nello

1. Facing the Giants -- if you are a Christian and you haven't seen this movie, this is a MUST SEE!! The most intense scene (IMHO) is when one of the football players does the crawl with another player on his back as a demonstration...that scene alone is life changing. The movie truly has impacted my life. If we win, we praise God. If we lose, we praise God!

2. A Walk to Remember -- okay some would argue that this is a chick flick but it has a message about believing in yourself, living your life, love, and hope...how your life can change. Maybe God has bigger plans for me than I had for myself.

3. The Story of Us -- this is a story of life...about relationships. The monologue at the end right after "I want to eat at Chow Funs" is a great outlook on marriage and the choice to stay together. I don't know of a better movie that exemplifies the way relationships work and about ultimately choosing to "eat at Chow Funs."

4. I Am Sam -- this movie made me cry within the first 10 minutes, now that says something about a movie. This is a great story about a daddy/daughter relationship and about advocacy for those who can't advocate for themselves. Being a social worker, this aligns with our guiding principles.

5. When a Man Loves a Woman -- what an intense, real movie about addiction and the relationships of the addict (or alcoholic).

6. The Shawshank Redemption -- this is hard to watch at times but it is soooo good!! It's about hope even in the most hopeless situations. It all comes down to a choice, "Get busy living, or get busy dying."

7. Life is Beautiful--I cannot believe that I would not have watched this because it has subtitles. I was in a situation where I didn't really have a choice and when the subtitles came up, I thought I would never "get in" to this movie because of the subtitles. I was wrong. This is such a great movie, also about hope. This is one to be experienced!

8. My Big Fat Greek Wedding -- I love this story about reinventing yourself and finding your spirit!

9. Dead Poets Society-- Who hasn't seen this inspiring classic? I saw it in high school and was so impacted by its message that it makes my list nearly 20 years later. Seize the day! No matter what anyone tells you, words and ideas can change the world. Make your life extraordinary!

10. Mr. Holland's Opus -- the moment we live for...the moment we can look around and see the melody and notes of our own opus....see the music our lives!

11. Regarding Henry -- I love the innocence of the post shot Henry and the relationship between he and his daughter. How she teaches him to tie his shoes...and my favorite line of all is when they are making cookies and he wants to make one big cookie. She doesn't laugh at him at all, just tells him that it doesn't cook right and she knows because she tried it before. Our kids can teach us so much, if we will allow ourselves to be innocent and vulnerable minded!

12. Parenthood -- this movie takes a look at so many different angles of parenthood...I love its comedy and reality and many messages! Best line from that movie (cleaned up a bit), "You know, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car, and to catch a fish...but they'll let anybody be a father."

13. Les Miserables -- now I've seen a stage version and had trouble following it, but the 1998 version with Liam Neeson is truly a great movie about forgiveness and mercy.

This was a difficult task to narrow down 13 movies that have impacted my life. There may be more that haven't come to mind or would be on a longer list and who knows what movies I have yet to see or haven't been made yet. Just like I quoted from the Dead Poet's Society, words and ideas can change the world...words and ideas can change your life. And this is just one medium of receiving words and ideas.

May Day Weight Loss Challenge

I need to get serious. My weight is going the wrong direction. I think a wake up call came yesterday when I went to the doctor...and those blasted scales... In 2002, I started Weight Watchers and lost 50 pounds over the next 18 months. Maintaining was a pain, it would go up a little...down a little. My problem is that over the last few months, it has steadily gone up. The doctor's scale yesterday matched my scale tonight and I need to lose (drum roll please) 22 pounds. I know HOW to do this. I know I CAN do this. So it is TIME to do this. I am joining the May Day Weight Loss Challenge that I learned about on Tales from the Scales. Tuesday will be my weigh in day...just like the good old days with WW...I went to meetings on Tuesday nights.

Enjoying Scriptures Like Honey

I don't know how or why this came to me... I have struggled with daily quiet time with my Lord and Savior for the last couple of years. At one time, I found myself able to do it and loving it and wanting more. But now, I don't know if I am lazy or distracted or what. But I know that a daily quiet time is something I want and need in my life. Yesterday I purchased some Scripture candy from my local Christian bookstore. It cost me about $3.00. In the bag were quite a few hard candies that had special wrappers around each, containing a verse of Scripture. I said a quick prayer for God to lead me to randomly grab a verse that I needed. At first, I didn't even know why He would send me that verse...but the more I thought and visited with God, the more I realized what He was trying to say to me. I did this in my car and when I got home, I grabbed a notebook (actually got it free from something I asked for online which I would have linked to this blog but I couldn't find it as I searched just now...). In the notebook, I quickly wrote the verse and my thoughts on it. I said to myself, hey--this is easy, quick, and it comes with a sweet treat (or sour or minty or whatever your pleasure). Of course, spending an hour a day studying Scripture would be better, but this is an easy way to start.

After all, Psalm 119:103 tells us, "How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!"

Thirteen Main Parts of Me

Banner Courtesy of: http://www.peanutwagon.net/blog/T13/


My attempt at dividing myself into 13 different parts...

1. Child of God--my relationship with God--my views on Scripture and Church

2. Wife--I love my dear husband and have grown in our marriage so much. This is an area of continual growth!

3. Mom--Since pregnancy (and even before), I've been fascinated with parenting and the role we play in our children's lives. Each stage of mothering has brought the need for me to become an expert by absorbing all reading material and talking to others going through the same or who have gone through...

4. Social Worker--ahhhhhh, my ministry

5. Family Historian--just a fancy way to relate my love for scrapbooking

6. Family Manager--this involves meal planning, house keeping, and the like

7. Captain of Creativity--at one time, I was have creativity juices flowing through my veins....and now it seems to drip, drip, drip. But I am in the process of reviving this in me and try to instill it in my family.

8. Finance Manager--a shared role with my dear husband (like many of these), but I am continually learning to manage money better, save money on groceries, pay off debt, and the like

9. Recovery Cheerleader--Addictions are a great interest of mine...and I'm battling my own addictions, some more serious than others. I am my own cheerleader, but the cheerleader of others. I am a firm believer in the 12 steps and believe they (with the help of our Lord and Savior) SAVE LIVES!!!

10. Clown--okay, okay--these titles of my parts are really getting to be sad! My sense of humor is invaluable to me! It has held me together at times! I enjoy a good giggle and need this every day. You cannot take life or yourself too seriously!!!!

11. Philosopher--my analytical mind works overtime--this can be nice--this can be a curse!! I also am a collector of words of wisdom. Words can change your life, sometimes for the better...sometimes not so much!

12. Personal Growth and Development Director--be it physical (been a weight watcher since 2002, reached goal weight in 2004, now struggling to lose again to my goal weight), mental (finished grad school in 2006, but desire to continually develop my brain), or whatever area of personal development--living things grow--I wanna live!!!

13. THIS SPACE FOR RENT--and what exactly does this mean? It may seem random, but it is intentional. I love, love, love the number 13! It is my lucky number--after all I was born on the 13th. Loving the number 13 led me to adding this meme to my blog. I thought dividing my SELF into 13 parts would be fun, would be meaningful, and would be so me. However, I think there needs to be room for a part to emerge. Who knows what it will be or when. Sure, it could replace another part, other parts may merge to allow growth, any number of things could happen. BUT...leaving room gives freedom as well as a readiness to allow God to bring something into your life unexpectedly. I'm open to this....I gotta room ready for you, whatever or whoever you are!!

A Cup of Tea

This past January, I took on my Diet Coke addiction. I drank a great deal of Diet Coke every day. Most days, I drove to Sonic and ordered a large Diet Coke each morning. Some days, I would get a second one. Plus, I would drink a couple of cans throughout the day,and anytime I went out to eat, if they had Diet Coke, I would drink glass after glass and often take a "to go" cup with me. I was convinced I was addicted, but to what? Well, I bought a lot of caffeine free Diet Coke, only to learn it isn't really the caffeine. (hee, hee) I thought it was the bubbles. Whatever the pull, something in me knew that I needed to break the hold it had on me. Even getting to the point of wanting to quit was progress for me. At one time, I knew it was an addiction but WHY would I want to stop?! It was even a part of my identity. I was known for having that big Sonic cup or that can of Diet Coke. I even had an email address that was dietcokegirl1313 @whatever domain name.

But when I was ready...and this is such an important thing to know! WHEN I WAS READY... I made that decision and ordered unsweet tea at my next opportunity. It wasn't bad. I have learned that most sit down restaurants make a good glass of tea. With fast food, it is a mixed bag! Sometimes it is bitter. My sister (who is a bit of a food service expert) says it is from sitting in the urn too long. Unsweet tea isn't ordered as much as sweet tea down here in the South. So the sweet tea runs out and a fresh batch is made. But unless you get them after a fresh batch of unsweet tea is made (and good fast food joints know to pour out old tea and make new periodically), it may be a tad bitter. Hint: get those crystallized lemon or lime packets and add some of that if the tea is bitter...works for me!

Well, I stopped drinking it on January 18th. Granted, I have had a glass or two since, but I didn't have any at all for 10 weeks. Research on the Internet led me to believe I might have been addicted to Aspartame. See for yourself at: http://www.holisticmed.com/aspartame/ I avoid Aspartame now. When I need a diet sweetener, I turn to Splenda or Xylitol. For the most part, though, I drink unsweet tea. My sister told me that it is an acquired taste. It didn't take much time at all to acquire the taste either. I also enjoy a cup of hot tea. As I am writing this, I am sipping on a cup of green tea. The warmth and the comfort that comes from sipping on the tea is great. When I am trying to nurture myself with food, hot tea is a gift. You can enjoy it all day long. Just sitting and sipping....and with no sugar, it has no calories. It helps me not to want to snack or drink things that aren't really too good for me. Water is good, but tea has that little something extra. Plus the benefits of tea seem to be pretty good, again see for yourself( http://www.healthcastle.com/tea.shtml) and the flavors and colors give so much variety...there's something for everyone!

A Thousand Miles...

This is my first step. I have no real idea what I'm doing. I peep into many other folk's blogs and decided I want to start my own. There are so many parts of me that I would like to "separate" and organize. Because right now, I am completely overwhelmed by my life. And these blogs I read look like there are some others who do a lot of what I do but they've gotten it all together...maybe it will work for me, too! One can hope! Maybe this will help me organize my life and get a handle on things. Maybe this will help me become accountable, even if no one peeps in on my blog...just knowing that I have a blog to "report" to may make a difference! So my journey of a thousand miles has started TODAY and this blog is my first step. What's next? I don't even know, but this blog will evolve and so shall I.